Tuesday, March 5, 2019

SOL19 Slice #5 What's happening to us?



I am participating in the
 Slice of Life Story Challenge (SOL19)
All participants are writing about one moment, one part of their day, every day for the month of March 2019.

A big thank you to Two Writing Teachers for providing this unique opportunity
for teacher-writers to share and reflect.



Are you finding that people you know and love are much crankier these days, "short-fused," argumentative?

It seems to me that something is just OFF with our world.

A blatant example - I recently got together with women friends...friends I've known since my adult children were in elementary school. It has been months since we've seen one another, each of us busy with our work, our families, our lives. I was so excited to see everyone!

But pleasure it was not to be. One friend was combative, belligerent, argumentative. Truly.

I have a huge need to hear from others. I was so excited to hear about everyone's lives, to hear their perspectives on all the complicated topics of our current world.

But, she -
was at a lectern,
showering us with the world according to her.
It was a lack of conversation,
and,
instead,
a bullying -
hear ME, hear MY opinion, it is RIGHT.

It was incredibly sad.

What brought her to this place? What happened?
Had she preceded the evening with a couple of drinks?
Is she having marital problems? Family problems?
What is going on?

Although she was barking at us, it was very clear that there was some sort of a wall up. When we asked her to share about her family, she said "No, I have nothing to share."

Ugh.

This evening seemed so precious to me. It was the first time in months, honestly, that I had spent time with these women. But, something was truly off....


Switch scenes:
School, dismissal time. Two different grandmothers come to pick up their preschoolers and both spew anger at me. The first one, "Why is she on a cot without sheets?!" [She had a toileting accident...we cleaned it up, she is fine, she didn't want to go back to sleep, we had her sit with a book...] Grandmother barked at me just like my girlfriend had...no patience in her voice. She was right, I was wrong. The second one, "Why is he on a cot right next to the door?!" [I have 22 napping preschoolers...cots are everywhere...someone must have their cot next to the door.] Again - cutting me no slack, not allowing me to explain, simply complaining.

In neither case were they conversing with me. Just like my friend on our night out, they were combative, impatient, RIGHT.

It's exhausting. Really.

I am with their grandchildren for seven hours every day. I do not let children speak to me or each other in this way. If I do hear someone get 'cranky' with another (grabbing toys, yelling), we breathe in, breathe out, and do over - finding a kinder way to be.

But the adult models in this world...hmmm. We are pretty tightly wound these days.

Yes, I said "we," not "they."
I, too, have been 
thin-skinned and reactive.

Are we too rushed?
Too burdened?
Poisoned by our political leaders?

Are we rewarding bullies?

It feels as if the bullies are winning.

Sad.


2 comments:

  1. I am sorry you had to experience these negative interactions, or rather negative talking at you. I hope that during the next days you will come across people who have kind words to share.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! I hope so, too! It feels as if I'm under a bit of a cloud....

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